Women in ministry?
One of my most challenging experiences has been when one of the Staff members where I was doing some pastoral care asked me a pretty simple question, “so do you think you will be a pastor?” as I was heading out the door. The question wasn’t asked as a mere curiosity type of question, but rather it was asked with a tone of “you better say you are not going to be a pastor!”
All of the sudden all of those fears, anxieties and misgivings about my call came rushing into my mind. “Yes, it is ridiculous that a woman thinks that she can get into the ministry – God only calls men.” “Yes, why are you here? Do you really think God said to YOU of all people, ‘come and follow me I want to make you a pastor’?” I sat there staring at her I am sure for a minute or so as I listened to my own internal voice.
I then tried to hear what she was really asking. She was asking whether a woman could be a pastor. I said to her, “I know a lot of people have a lot of thoughts on women in ministry. Some think that women can be pastors. And other religions absolutely will not have it. I don’t want to be a pastor of a church. I don’t feel like that is what the Lord has called me to. I feel called to be a hospice chaplain.”
Then I realized I had really struck a nerve. My low key tones and understanding and sympathetic eyes were not working. She was angry at what I had said. As she started talking I kept thinking to myself “what did I say?” “Oh so you think women can be called, huh? So God talked to you? God told you to be a pastor? So you won’t be a pastor of a church but you will preside over funerals, eh?”
My language now became that of a babbling brook. “Well, not a pastor in front of a large congregation. I can’t see that for me. Yes, but I guess I will be officiating funerals every once in a while. And I may fill in for a pastor on one Sunday. And I guess it is kind of hard to believe God would speak to me.” None of this was helping. I looked at the other folks in the room and they were just staring at this tennis match of words being played out in front of them. They couldn’t speak. Their eyes were fixated. Their jaws dropped. And then I simply said, “I just don’t know why God asked me to do this. I don’t have the answers. But I just pray I am a blessing to those around me. I better go.”
I can still feel the tenseness in my body and how I felt absolutely stunned. Had God put this woman in my path to say I don’t belong in the ministry? Had she asked those questions to test me? What am I doing? Where am I going with all of this ordination stuff anyhow? Why am I here?
Before I put in the "end of the story" I would be interested in your comments. Do women belong in ministry??
One of my most challenging experiences has been when one of the Staff members where I was doing some pastoral care asked me a pretty simple question, “so do you think you will be a pastor?” as I was heading out the door. The question wasn’t asked as a mere curiosity type of question, but rather it was asked with a tone of “you better say you are not going to be a pastor!”
All of the sudden all of those fears, anxieties and misgivings about my call came rushing into my mind. “Yes, it is ridiculous that a woman thinks that she can get into the ministry – God only calls men.” “Yes, why are you here? Do you really think God said to YOU of all people, ‘come and follow me I want to make you a pastor’?” I sat there staring at her I am sure for a minute or so as I listened to my own internal voice.
I then tried to hear what she was really asking. She was asking whether a woman could be a pastor. I said to her, “I know a lot of people have a lot of thoughts on women in ministry. Some think that women can be pastors. And other religions absolutely will not have it. I don’t want to be a pastor of a church. I don’t feel like that is what the Lord has called me to. I feel called to be a hospice chaplain.”
Then I realized I had really struck a nerve. My low key tones and understanding and sympathetic eyes were not working. She was angry at what I had said. As she started talking I kept thinking to myself “what did I say?” “Oh so you think women can be called, huh? So God talked to you? God told you to be a pastor? So you won’t be a pastor of a church but you will preside over funerals, eh?”
My language now became that of a babbling brook. “Well, not a pastor in front of a large congregation. I can’t see that for me. Yes, but I guess I will be officiating funerals every once in a while. And I may fill in for a pastor on one Sunday. And I guess it is kind of hard to believe God would speak to me.” None of this was helping. I looked at the other folks in the room and they were just staring at this tennis match of words being played out in front of them. They couldn’t speak. Their eyes were fixated. Their jaws dropped. And then I simply said, “I just don’t know why God asked me to do this. I don’t have the answers. But I just pray I am a blessing to those around me. I better go.”
I can still feel the tenseness in my body and how I felt absolutely stunned. Had God put this woman in my path to say I don’t belong in the ministry? Had she asked those questions to test me? What am I doing? Where am I going with all of this ordination stuff anyhow? Why am I here?
Before I put in the "end of the story" I would be interested in your comments. Do women belong in ministry??
posted by williscj | 12:22 PM
4 Comments:
Yes.
I don't know how to elaborate in a meaningful way so I'll leave it at that.
Women definitely can be -- and should be -- ministers. It's unfortunate that some people continue to view women as second-class when it comes to answering God's call as ordained clergy.
I definitely think women can be called and I especially think YOU have been called! And hospice chaplain - how very perfect! How many people even KNOW where they can do the most good? And YOU KNOW you have done good for everyone you come in contact with...with every life you have touched including ours.
God DID NOT put this woman in your path to say you don't belong in ministry; He put her there so you could reaffirm where you belong and where you do the most good! And that you do by following your calling! Pick yourself up, shake yourself off and reignite that self-confidence spark I know you have!!
I have actually run into this question a lot. One of the responses I often want to give is, "Who are you to confine God's call to any gender or race." I have yet to actually give that as a response yet :-)
One of my male, Southern Baptist friends has had quite a bit of time to decide whether he supports me or not in my call and he has decided to. When I asked him how he can support me, his response was that he had prayed about it and watched me for a long time. He came to the conclusion that I was doing what I was supposed to do: following God's will. After that, he could not argue with my call. He and I have had a few conversations about women in ministry, none have been threatening though some have said the same things this woman said to you. When others ask my friend now about me or other women in ministry, he tells them that he thinks there are some churches in which some women should not lead, BUT there are also some churches in which some men should not lead. God sends who God sends and we should not argue with that.
There is no easy way around the questions that make you question your own call. If you continue to pray and follow God's voice as it calls you, their voices do not matter.
It was GREAT to see you yesterday!!
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